Where do I begin?? I’m just…SHAKING right now…

Okay, sushi last night was good – it was easy to talk to each other, like nothing had changed. Tim’s doing really well in Waterloo – school’s kind of kicking his ass time-wise, but that comes with the territory so it’s fine.

I ended up eating way too much but it was kind of a good thing because it made me feel really UNsexy. Weird logic, but it was important to keep this just a casual friends thing…

A lot of sake later, we went back to my place for a nightcap and things got…interesting. Long story short…

…

We fooled around and he spent the night. I KNOW, I sort of copped out on my own promises, but it felt so right! There was a total rehashing of connections and sparks between us. Maybe part of it I can blame on the booze but…it was too hard to say no. It was too much good nostalgia to pass up!

Plus, it’s really important to point out that we both wanted it. Hard.

Anyways, this morning at breakfast, I just came clean to Tim: I still have feelings for him and I can’t deny it. And after last night before, why bother right?

He said he has feelings for me still too…but that he’s also really enjoying our arrangement, having fun seeing other people in Waterloo.

NOT. COOL. TIM. He should have told me that BEFORE everything happened last night.

Basically, I feel really cheap and stupid and used.

I don’t even want to see him again before he goes.